5% business, 95% stupid jokes.

Emma Crossland & Sam Wilkinson welcome you to Crossland & Wilkinson, the funniest megacorporation on the FTSE100. This induction covers vital topics like company history, your place in our grand plan (sorry, "strategy") and all the usual corporate bollocks that you’ve been ignoring in your own job for years.

Today’s agenda includes: hypnosis, secret codes, puppets, monkeys, murder... all the usual things you’d need covering on your first day at a new job.

Possibility of moustaches.